Thanks Sannah and P7.

I'm not feeling so good today.. My counsellor has said that if she sees me losing anymore weight right before her eyes, she'll take matters into her own hands and contact my GP, forcing me to have blood tests and such done to see what my potassium and blood sugar levels and such are like. She wants me to have a thorough health check. I refused. It was either: Stop doing the food diary and continue working on the new stuff in our sessions, or keep doing the food diary go to my GP and show it to her and ask to have tests done. It was obvious what I'd choose.

I'm so scared I don't care if they drop, I just don't want my GP finding out. I don't want all the fuss, I don't want her to make me have checkups every week or have Connor checking up on me every five seconds. I can't deal with that. They'll both try and force me to eat, then they'll probably make me see a dietician or counsellor will do a food plan with me. If she tries to, I'll say I don't feel ready yet. I'm terrified of that moment. From now on, I'm wearing big, heavy jumpers when i see her to cover up any weight loss.. All I see is me getting fatter, but all she sees is me getting thin.

I ache so much and feel so sick and just want to disappear.