That's how it goes with the bipolar...feel crappy, then happy...

I know what you mean about "last day of drug free life." For most of my life I kept away from any kind of psychoactive drug, especially recreational ones. It was a strange feeling to start in with the antidepressants, then learn that I needed bipolar meds as well...

No regrets, because they have worked for me thus far.

Good luck, just give your doc all the honest details about what has been going on, and don't leave out the times you have felt your worst....