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Dear KP...
ECT does work in extremely depressed people, but then there is the part of ECT that you have to be on maintenance doses which means going in every week to have them...and they won't give them to you if you are pregnant because of the harm that it might do to the fetus...
if you truly want another baby, then you might have to have some counseling. it sounds like you had a bad bout of post-partum depression after your little girl was born. I also nursed my daughter until she was 16 months old, but I should have stopped sooner to take care of myself. It sounds like you should do the same and take some sort of medication along with counseling. It is very difficult to treat ppd unless you really want the help. I finally let go of nursing to get help for me. I was on antidepressants that helped very much, as well as counseling. It is a very good idea for you to get help. So your daughter doesn't get her nursing in, it won't hurt her to be put on regular food. You aren't denying her anything, you are trying to be a good mom. I know all the feelings about nursing/not nursing/being a good mom. I KNOW the pain it brings thinking about it. But if you want to be a good mom, get some help through counseling. Learn how to act appropriately in front of the kids. The diagnoses don't mean anything if you aren't willing to help yourself. And ECT won't help in the long run. It only helps in the short run. You have to WANT to get better, WANT to be the best mom you can be without scaring your children.
I am sorry if this sounds harsh, I really didn't mean for it to sound that way. But sometimes we need to be brought up short for a time so we can once again focus on ourselves and get help for US so we can be there for our kids. I know. I've been where you are now. If you need help, you need help. There is no shame in that. You need to figure out what you need, and then acquire it no matter what. You owe it to yourself to get well. You do. Honest.
Jewels
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True love exists when we lose ourselves to invest in the care of others.
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