I think the confusion comes in cause quite a few of us have a hard time confronting conflict. The whole fight or flight thing and using humor is(for me anyway) the easiest way to flight. So in therapy we learn that fleeing isnt always the best way to handle things and the confusion comes when it seems well encouraged in the world. No one likes the squeeky wheel yet, some of us anyway, internalize the things we let fester inside. So the choice seems to be hate ourselves and keep quiet or be hated and speak up. Whats the right answer? Seems both have definate disadvantages to me. Like i said, confusion