Oh from the time I was 12 to 17, I couldn't stand so many things, I hated school, the bullies, just waking up
Back then I thought it wasn't getting better, and everything was a waste.
I can't temember how things had a turn for the better, kind of hazy (I'm old, ha!ha!) but I think interests, reading about things I became interested such as plants, music, poetry, journalling and drawing, kind of took me away from obsessing with that I felt was wrong, oh boy, and did I obsess. . .still do a little, wish it was about keeping the house immaculate.
I use to be a fussy neat freak, mellowed with age
I did express to my dermatologist how depressed I was, and having severe, scarring acne did not help either, it was horrible, went through 10 painful years with it, and now full of pock marks, but even can deal with it, even have decided to not have cosmetic surgery . . . what a change from the kid that couldn't stand for people to see me all pimply, and yes a little chubby.
The weight thing sad to say triggered me to being anorexic, another hurdle I overcame.
I wish I had something that would help you to have faith, that things get better, and there are the good days and not so good, but please hang in there.

Sincerely,
DE