Thread: Dream about T
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Old Jun 19, 2009, 07:23 AM
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lifelesstraveled lifelesstraveled is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2008
Location: East Coast
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Not sure of i should put this here or in psychotherapy...

I took a nap yesterday after work. Right before I fell asleep, I was replaying part of my therapy session from wed. The part where my T said "it's not your fault. It was your parents' job to attuned to you to meet your needs and take care of you. But because they were wrapped up in their own lives, they didn't. But it's not your fault". Even though part of me wanted to end the conversation--I hate talking about my childhood/myself--I also got this sense/feeling of safety and that nothing was wrong with me as the conversation went on.

Apparently I took this feeling with me into my dream. The beginning of the dream I can't quite recall, but I remember at one point T and I were walking and I am not sure if we did much talking, if any, but I got this feeling like she was right beside me and I was going to be okay. While we were walking I asked where we were going (I can't remember the answer). I stopped and sat on a set of concrete stairs flipping through a magazine--I didn't want to go any further. T sat near me and wanted to know what was going on and I ignored her attempts to get me to open up. Eventually I told her I didn't want to go and she can go on without me. That I was fine where I was. She told me that it was okay if I continued to go with her she said there is nothing to be scared of---that she was right there. I sat for a while staring at her. I am not sure what my reasoning was for wanting to stop, but there was some sense of dread or fear in the dream. I eventually decided to continue on and we walked into a room and that's when my rage let loose--I have no clue what triggered it. I was wild animal. At one point T completely disappeared and I was destroying the room I was in-- knocking over bookcases and tearing pillows off the couch and lamps off of tables.There were other people-men- in the room and I started shoving them and fighting with them. I started my way to the drapery and I was ready to have a go at those and that is when T reappeared and I calmed down almost immediately. I looked at T and felt a crazy sense of peace that flowed through me--then I woke up feeling empty. I wish I could go back to that dream.
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