I helped a client write a letter (he actually sent it) confronting his father and setting conditions for letting him back into his life. It was pretty harsh.

I helped my kids get a father's day card, while musing about all the wonderful things that the cards say and that I just don't feel that way about my father.

I felt like crying while listening to the tributes to fathers and all that they do for us in church, and was vaguely aware of being sad because mine just didn't do those things.

I thought about calling him, or sending an e-card, because that's what we're supposed to do, and then got busy with other things and forgot.

I don't know if I should feel bad about not calling him and not sending a card or anything. My father isn't bad and didn't do terrible things. He just didn't seem to know that I existed except when he was trying to get me to be like him. I didn't want to be like him, so I was invisible. My family never bothered with cards or phone calls or anything like that. They said it was a waste of money. They never called for birthdays or holidays, etc. So why feel bad for not calling them? Um, I thought I didn't want to be like them, but I guess I am like them.