Deli,
I don't blame you. I know its really hard to think about them leaving you. You just started seeing "Austin", you spoke of how you were really liking how he has been helping you, only to hear he is moving on. That has to be really difficult.
I have often resorted to what you mentioned about leaving them before they leave you so as not to get hurt.
Heck when my T said she was going away for a couple weeks, I was like ok no big deal. But I lied, I will miss her, I just didn't want her to know that, whats the deal with that? lol....I guess I don't want people to know I need them because if they leave they won't know how much it hurts me.

I'm sorry you are having such a rough time with all of this right now. I really hope you are able to open up to p-doc about how you feel.