Hangingon - thank you so much for your post. I have a similar thing happening in therapy and although i've been back and discussed how hurt i have been by her actions and she has apologised, i've never really allowed myself to be as emotionally involved in therapy in the same way. This situation isn't like yours in that although i have been hurt by her actions i can tell i'm being manipulative by holding it against her as i am doing. I really shouldn't go to therapy if i am going to continue doing that because nothing will ever change no matter what she says to me if i simply hold a grudge....even if that grudge is because i feel so vulnerable. So i wanted to thank you for posting your experience, and for showing me that although it is very scary to trust again, i perhaps can gain back some degree of relationship with this therapist if i decide i want to.
Good luck with the continuation of your therapy. You are a very brave person!