Jay,

I am so glad you are making healthy choices! I know it's hard to do this but you can.... I ended up telling the person that it's not healthy for me to stay in contact with them. That they need help, and I cannot provide it. I told him where to get the help.

Then I didn't respond to his attempts to draw me into the unhealthy drama.

IT WAS SO HARD!!!!

But you can do it, Jay.

Hi JayS,

I'm sorry you are having this kind of difficulty. It is not easy setting your boundaries with someone, but for your sake and for hers it sounds like it must be done.

I am concerned though about this statement that you made - Jay, I hate to tell you this, but there is no easy way to do this. If you continue to look for an easy way, you will be wasting your time and precious time for this person to get the help she deserves. You will be putting off the inevitable as well........

As hard as it's going to be, and in my opinion, it's time to speak to her parents and let them know how she is treating you, what she is doing to herself and how you need to walk away from her and her situation for both your safety. You've tried to help, she is not open to that help, one cannot "make" her accept your help and choose to help herself. There is no shame in admitting that you can no longer help someone. There is no shame in setting your boundary and taking care of yourself in the process.

Wishing you both well,


sabby