Thank you very much darkpurplesecrets. Your reply actually made me cry but for the first time in too many days it was because I realised that you really really cared rather than didn't.
I find it really hard to talk about these sort of feelings to people and being able to say it here has helped but getting the sort of encouragement that I can find here is amazing.
It has been so long since I've felt cared for and loved that I think I'd forgotten what it was like.
I will remember all three of you Amazonmom, justfloating and darkpurplesecrets tonight and try to get through each second.

It just hits me so often, the moments when I feel like just breaking down and crying. I know that today I lost it in class today when someone told me that they saw my boyfriend out at a pub last night. It's just so hard.
My dad rang me also and told me that he's glad that we are on a break because he hates my boyfriend. I was so stunned mostly because I thought that today couldn't get any worse.

I just feel so empty now, like there's nothing to be hopeful for because it only seems to get worse. Tomorrow cannot come quick enough.