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Jul 01, 2009, 12:09 PM
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Member Since: Feb 2006
Location: California
Posts: 361
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HotRod74
My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 yrs, I'm 25 and he's 35, and recently he said wanted some space, to see where he stands and to see if this is what he wants in a relationship, so he moved in with his brother. I feel like he has some form of depression but I know he won’t go to a doctor because I asked if we could maybe do some counselling and he said no because it’s stupid. He gets to where he doesn’t want to be bothered by me or his own children, doesn’t want to talk to anyone or anything. He says he feels like he works for nothing, and isn’t getting anywhere in life. He says he loves me, and cares about me, and has never felt this way about anyone, but doesn’t know if this is what he wants in a relationship. He’s had two failed marriages and has one child from each, so I don’t know if he’s afraid this will fail too. I’m so confused about what to do at this point because I want to help him, but he won’t let me. I know he has to make the first step, and I can’t make him, but I don’t want to loose him. It's starting to affect the way I feel, I don't want to go to work, I hate going anywhere and being around anyone anymore, I just want to stay home. I want to call and talk to him all the time because I feel like I have no answers. I don't know if he's through and doesn't want to tell me, if I should just give him his space. He seeps saying just give me my space and see what happens. I've never loved anyone as much as I do him, he means the world to me and I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT TO DO, I am absolutely lost. Any advice????
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My boyfriend deals with his stress the way your boyfriend and thats isolating themselves with they've had enough of their troubles. I would worry and want to be by his side to comfort him but in reality that had only made things worst. The best thing you can do is simply tell him that you're aware he's not doing so well right now and that you will respect him for wanting his space and remind him that you'll here to be there for him and just have him call you when he needs you. His mind his cluttered with stress and he won't be able to be himself and be there for you like before. Be strong and not let our worries get the best of you. Don't panic and make things worst for the two of your guys. The future of your relationships will work out if its meant to be, you can't control how he feels. Allow him to think things through and when its time he'll come back to you. I had always learned this the hard way.
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