I'm trying. I know I'm working bloody hard in therapy. Getting on so well with my counsellor helps a bunch.

I just spoke to one of the SWEDA supporters. I got a lot off my chest, it was really helpful. *slumps shoulders* Connor's figured out that I'm not eating.. He was talking about when he comes over tomorrow.. I said that I wouldn't be eating because I was sick and didn't want to feed the bug. He asked me if I was sick because of not eating, I couldn't lie. He's getting angry I hate it when he gets angry and I'm trying so hard to explain why I'm doing it and why he can't help, why no-one can help me but myself etc. He just doesn't understand and he doesn't seem to want to..

I know he wants to help and I know he feels useless when he knows that he can't help.. But I've explained that him trying to force me to eat makes me worse, it makes me want the control even more, therefore starve even more. I hate this