I've always been a little depressed, but I always just brushed it off, thinking I was just a pessimist. In the last 3 years or so it has become a lot worse. I'm 23 years old and I feel like I have never lived my life. At the same time sometimes I feel like I have gone as far as I possibly can with my life. I've had a suicidal thoughts here and there since I was 12, but like my depression, they have become much more frequent.

Lately I have been wondering if it is more than just depression. My father is an alcoholic, and I always suspected he had some form of Bi-Polar disorder. He very clearly has the ups and downs that are traditionally associated with Bi-Polar. The problem is I never have those "up" manic periods. The closest I ever get to that is when I think to myself "Don't worry, It will be OK. It's not that bad, just get out into the world."

I also sometimes feel as though I may have some kind of social anxiety. I haven't spoken to any of my friends in years, and I'm very reluctant to contact any of them. As it is right now, I really don't have any friends, and I feel very lonely.

Also, this may be a stupid question, but is mental illness genetic? My sister has had her share of struggles too, and my uncle killed himself when I was a baby. Is it possible that different kinds of mental illness can be inherited?

I realize this is a lot in one post, but I really just wanted to get as much as I can out at once. I apologize if it is too long or in the wrong forum. I debated about where to post this for a while, but decided Depression was the best place, because I feel that is the primary symptom.

Thanks to everyone who responds.