I hope you are able to seek help from a psychologist & psychiatrist for this. I, too, have OCD & am in therapy for it (& an eating disorder) & on medication. I will be 33 this month, but remember having OCD rituals I had to perform in 5th & 8th grades, & maybe other grades, too; I don't remember, but I do recall the rituals I had while in those two grades. I have a fear of germs & I hoard things. I wash my hands a lot, too. I am doing better, but some rituals I can't give up, while I have been able to give up some other ones. It's not easy, but you can make it!