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I feel more neglected than usual. My husband of 6+ years has tried to say he hasn't given up on me, but I feel like he has. He goes out, does things with my own family (mother/father/grandmother) of all people...and tells me just to deal with my own "crap". When I tell him I am gaining confidence and feel as though I should do things on my own, he tells me "fine, go ahead, leave me then!"
Today is Independence Day and I drank. I couldnt deal with my family and their constant ways of putting me down in front of my face like they have in the past. I needed to get a way from that toxic environment.
I cut. I bled. I drank again. Ritalin. Vicodin. What's next?
Everyone in my family tells me "Oh, you know nothing will happen, come on,
you took 81 Xanax, 17 Valium, 22 Lexapro, and what, 19 beers, you say in one night...no biggie!"
I hate to sound so selfish on these forums, but every little bit of respect I gain for myself, I have one more person close to me put me down, and believe I can't change. I truly feel like maybe this is it.
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