Berries, I'm sick of it too! Think of us as being in this together. I'm also with Paddy. We have to be proactive (I mean, when we're not feeling so terrible that we can't get out of bed). On a good day, I would write down all the treatment possibilities: talk therapy...and the various psychological disciplines/schools of thought, medications, exercise, goal setting, etc. and see what kind of progress you've made in each area in the past year. If it's only that you've tried 15 different medications that didn't work well, that's progress. And finding one that did help a little, all the better. Process of elimination blows but it's better than doing nothing. I'm sure you're doing all you can to get better. One day you'll think, I'm so glad I didn't give up when I was at my lowest!

It's okay to feel the way you are feeling. In fact, it would be abnormal to not be discouraged after all you've been through. You seem like a very strong person to have made it this far with all you are up against.