In re-reading my post, it occurred to me that it wasn't made clear that acceptance is the first step in a long process.

You need to accept yourself just as you are, take a long, hard look at what you've got to work with, sort out the good from the not so good. Set what you know as good in cement, so to speak, and then start working on what you don't like about yourself or things that you know need improvement. Certain "faults" can be changed to positives! Don't forget that.

Mental illness does NOT define who you are. Set that in a catagory by itself but still under that which can be changed.

Then you need to figure out what cannot be changed... or maybe we need to work on accepting that before we move on. That could be one of those things that falls under the catergory of "what works best for you."

My mom always told me when I had several chores to do, to start with the most difficult one first and get it out of the way. I found that if I started with the easy ones first, I gained assurance and with that, momentum to tackle the difficult chores later. What works best for you? If you don't know, try one method first and if it's a no go, try the other.