I don't know how to express my pain right now. It's just overwhelming inside of me. Nothing's wrong yet my heart is ripping apart. I wan't someone to know, but I don't. Why should I make them hurt and worry too? I don't know how to get through this right now. I want my husband to hold me right now but I won't wake him up. He has a stressful day tomorrow and may have to work up to 48 hours straight (plane crash happened). He doesn't need to deal with my insanity too at the moment. God I hate this. I can't hold the tears back anymore. Why can't letting them out bring release. I want blood to be pouring out of my arms right now. I want to run down the road until I can't and collapse on the street. Just to lie there and feel the cold rough cement burn along my skin. Wishing I was invisible yet seen at the same time. I had a fun night tonight. How can my mood shift so drastically when nothing occured to change it?
Guess I'm stuck on this couch... it may be my only hope for safety right now.