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eskielover · Jul 10, 2009, 03:05 PM

(((((((Orange Blossom))))))),

Sometimes we need a switch to just shut if all off......getting our mind to shut if all off & focus on some good things in life.....there are times when our mind ends up in a trap which is holding all the memories swirling around.......until we let ourselves out of the trap & break the thinking that is hurting so much.....we can't let it go.

Sometimes we need to just go somewhere, take a vacation, do something that takes us completely out of where we are for awhile.....even a couple of week vacation.......but I have found that the only way I have been able to break the thoughts are to take myself completely away from the trap I am in to break the cycle.

It doesn't mean the memories will go away....sometimes we are afraid of loosing the memories of the people we loved......but it helps to get rid of the stuck memories, put in completely other thoughts for awhile to clear our mind & then good thoughts & memories will start to trickle back in.

I know this has helped me many times while trying to survive the memories which were no where close to the memories you have had to go through......but when my mind gets flooded with bad thoughts, I have to clear my memory get completely away from the thoughts (a vacation, or some complete change to break my thoughts long enough to clear it all out)......when I come back to where I was, it isn't anything like what it was when I left & it takes awhile for the thoughts that were bothering me to build up again & it seems they never do build up to where they were.....but each time it happens & I am able to break where my mind is, the build us is less & less each time.

Just a thought that might be able to help.......it is sort of a checking out process.....but a good checking out process......a cruise......a vacation, just getting completely away.....but the mind has to let go to think completely of something good & beautiful & fun. Our mind needs that break after all the pain it has been holding onto.....as the mind can only hold so much without breaking itself......the only way we can really switch the mind off when it's so full is to completely get away & change everything for a little while. I found that a 2 week vacation was good for this myself....the first week was the letting go process, the second week was finally relaxed & the mind started to enjoy & fill itself with where I was, all the joy & pleasure of my current surroundings......by then, I was getting my strength back enough to feel ok about going back to my current surroundings & I had distinced myself enough that I was able to let go of the pain......so the painful surroundings I was going back to took awhile to even effect me again.

Hopefully you will be able to find a way to take a needed break so you don't break....cause without the break, the only break you will end up with is you.......PLEASE TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.....I know your hurts are so much greater than anything I experiences, & I know how bad I needed breaks like this to be able to cope with the pain in my memory.

Debbie