Rebecca,

You are on your way to recovery just by acknowledging the thoughts as they are and posting about how you know the truth is something totally different. Every time you get one of these thoughts in your head you have to negate it with something positive. That's the only way to stop the negative thoughts, trust me I've been there. One way that really worked for me is I imagined a four way intersection in my mind with the thoughts just racing through causing chaos. I stood in the middle of the intersection and put my hand up and forced the thoughts to stop. Once they were stopped they could not continue without my permission, which of course i never gave. When they started racing again I did the same thing. Today I am pretty much free of these pestering thoughts. No longer do they roar like out of control lions in my mind.

I also wanted to say that you are inherantly a good person. You are responsible and loving. You care for others and sound genuine. Try to negate those bad thoughts with these facts. Like the lateness issue. Every time that bad thought comes in tell yourself I'm not a horrible employee I was late and that happens to everybody. I'll make an increased effort to be on time from now on. You'll be surprised by how much this changes things.

I wish you all the best,

Love and Hugs,
Tara