I normally sleep, or clean when I have a lot on my mind. I do think about it sometimes, but I'm one of those that stuffs.

It was before I found out about my friend. I'm finding it hard and I'm really struggling with my ED, which is extremely hard to admit. But.. He has a lot on his mind at the moment and cancer on top of it is just not helping him at all.

I'm trying to give myself some space to work it out and I guess.. I'm just ranting a lot and trying to get it all off my chest, but if I wrote in a thread how i really felt, I'd look like a little kid that can't do anything for herself and can't deal with anything and isn't coping well at all.

I wish I could just be okay.