Hi, My name is Sherril and I live in Massachusetts. I've been diagnosed as depressed, anxiety ridden and panic struck for the past 23 years. My father committed suicide when I was 14. I believe he was diagnosed as schizophrenic. He was 44 years old...I am 41.
My life is good~I have nothing to complain about. I have a wonderful husband, 4 children, and a pretty good extended family. I don't work outside the home...there's plenty to do here!! lol
I am suffering badly from anxiety and I believe I have OCD.... I am completely obsessed about NOT getting sick. I am constantly washing my hands, making sure my children are washing their hands, constantly cleaning items, the bathrooms, doorknobs & cabinet handles, etc...etc.
I was recently sick with a sinus infection and was in bed for 2 days. I seriously thought of suicide...
I think of suicide each day. The only thing that keeps me here is my family. I live in an isolated country area and really have no friends. I have plenty of "acquaintances", but NO friends.
I have been in therapy since November. I hate that my doctor has me on 4 different meds...nothing is working. I am afraid to go anywhere else... no one else has been able to help me in 23 years... I've had many doctors, I've read A LOT of books, been on a lot of websites, taken yoga, gone swimming, exercised and changed my diet.
Each nite I have trouble falling asleep. I feel as though if I wasn't on "sleep meds", that I wouldn't fall asleep at all. As soon as I wake up, I am full of panic.
I need some serious advice...some serious help. Each day is a struggle to stay alive. Please, anyone...feel free to write me....
I look forward to hearing from you.
Sherril