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It sounds to me as though you have made it perfectly clear to him what your feelings are. He knows you want him to go to counseling with you and that you feel unhappy in your marriage. For him to say no to that request is not a good sign at all. All you can do is keep stating how you feel and asking him to do what you want him to do.
Meanwhile DO NOT stop your own therapy. It will help you through this bad time with your husband, one way or another. Keep getting help for yourself. Someone who truly loves you and wants the best for you would not be mad that you are taking care of yourself this way.
If your husband does not want to take care of himself, or do his 100% of work on your marriage (yes, in my opinion you both should be giving 100% to making the marriage work), then all you can do is work on that in therapy, get help making some healthy decisions for yourself. It won't be easy, but ultimately it will be worth it. Don't give up on yourself or your marriage. Good luck.
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