Doesn't sound like a good place to be. If he's dangerous to himself, he could be dangerous to you and your child. I'm not sure what the nature of his manic episodes are, but mine are full of anxiety and impulsiveness. I think I'm invincible and I get somewhat aggressive if anyone challenges me. Other people just talk super fast, don't sleep, drink, and act all goofy. But if he's mean in mania, it could get ugly.

If he keeps ignoring you about getting help or won't sit down and talk it over, maybe write him a note and find somewhere else to stay. I agree with whoever said to give him an ultimatum (and of course, you must be at a place where you are willing to follow through with it should he refuse to get help or just say he'll get help but never make an appointment or show up for therapy or to get meds).

Another thing. You got drunk and you were honest. He did have an affair, right? Maybe you shouldn't have said it to his friends, but some of them probably already know. Even if they didn't, it's still a legitimate hurt that he did this to you. So really, don't blame yourself for that. I tend to say hurtful things when I'm irritable, not drunk at all, and usually in the morning. We all have our weaknesses.

I hope you will find a way to respond to his actions that is healthy and safe for you and your child. Until he's in his right mind, it will be difficult to reason with him.

Stay in touch. We've been there. Luckily most of the bipolar people on this site are in therapy and on meds because they came to a place where the severe emotions were unbearable and causing serious problems in their lives and relationships.