It is true...the happiness between the couple is all what really matters.

All the case studies, all the probabilities, possibilities and outside influences of society can't determine the fate of a couple.

The opinions of others is not a criteria of mine. I listen with respect, and continue on my path. That is how I've always been. Even in my youth, when the advice of my elders probably would have been quite helpful.

I never viewed age as a number. However, I was always partial to those who were at least 5 years older and attracted to those 10+ older. For me, that was a normal thing. I never even questioned why..it was just as it was. But, I think because of this history of choices of age is why I had questioned my connection to Kristian, and our extremely opposite involvement of age range.
(Lesson here is....Never question Love as it IS).

What works for one person cannot be the recipe for another.
My dad was 7 years younger than my mom. They married when he was 22 and she was 29. (Dated eachother for only 3 months before marrying). Against the odds, they survived an enitre life together until her passing 14 years ago. However, I cannot say that it was a life that my mom loved. She was clinically depressed, severe anger issues regarding her youth and quite the heavy disciplinarian. If it were up to her, she would have left the marriage after her 5th child, (I am 6th).

However, divorce was uncommon then and not really accepted by society. Then, the vows of "honor and obey", "for better or for worse" were the rules. Back then, once married, it WAS a life sentence, without room for questioning..period. (Although, what I still don't understand is the fact that she knew she was miserable, wanted out, resented her position in life, yet she had another 5 more kids, anyway). Abortion or birth control were not accepted back then, especially in the Catholic society, which more than likely explains why 5 more were added.
It's no wonder she was so angry and tired. Yet, she is one of the most honorable and nobel persons I have known to date.
Throughout it all, dad proved himself as responsible, reliable, dependable and attentive. He was able to maintain a youthfulness about him that inspired the playfulness and silliness with us kids, (lol..kids), which compensated for what mom clearly could not offer. It seemed balanced. But again, back then the business of the burden of the parents were not displayed among the children, (quite the opposite in most cases now).

There was a time when mom told me, (during that one year that we actually were talking to eachother. A very short-lived bonding. I think I was around 26, or so), about her paths lived, choices made and reasons for such choices. I never cried for another as much as I had for her at that time.
How sorrowful for someone to have to settle for a lifetime of such unhappiness and misery. By the time divorce was more common, (and seemingly accepted by our society), mom was far too old to even consider the idea. By that time, all 10 of us kids were grown and long since moved out. She saw no point of seeking her own placement for herself as she felt she was nearing her journey's end, anyway. She was simply waiting for her passage, which she welcomed with open arms.
When she died, I did not grieve her passage much. Instead, I was grateful for her, that she was finally given something that she wanted for herself, even if that meant moving on through death.

Even though, throughout my life I have always been too stubborn, (or too stupid..sometimes, I don't see much of a difference), to 'conform' to the rules of what our society demands, I've learned through my mom's experience, (and I was fortunate that we had that one brief time of bonding, long enough for her to openly pass onto me her wisdom..(athough, I don't really think she intended it to be that, I received it as such, anyway).

Time is precious. We get one chance, one time around. And to conduct our own lives under the scrutiny of other's is absolute madness.

Evey single one of us is busy within our own selves as we struggle to merge that with the neverending pressures from those outside of ourselves. There is no set exactness that works for all. We all must first contend to that from within our own FIRST in order TO manage the pressures from those outside ourselves.

The journey of our own individual lives begin with the cry through our own first breath at birth. (No one else will breathe for you).
So should the remainder of our own journey be that with our mind through our own thoughts and choices. (No one else should think for you).

I am a 50 year old woman proudly chosing to share my life with a 28 year old man who is more than deserving of the person I am, (and visa versa).
There will be hardships and struggles, and undoubtedly a point where our sanity of choice WILL be questioned. No matter. Love will conquer all which awaits us throughout our journey together.

And, for any of those who question why I would choose someone so much my junior..perhaps, think maybe how fortunate I am TO have someone half my age who loves me as unconditonal as he does. Yay Me!..and lucky him...lol.

Thanks for all of the support from all of you.
Happy journeys for you all, as well.

Shangrala