i know what you're saying. unfortunately, my mind is bad right now. no meds. i will call monday to make an appt. with psychiatrist. my psychologist deals with issues not med. the summer is my worst time for ed. yesterday i "blew it" we had company and ate pizza. i didn't know how to not be rude/weird and not eat. i don't throw up so the food stayed. this morning i was back down to 105lbs. my body is just wacked and does it's own thing. it doesn't make any sense. but at least you know i got food into me yesterday along with caramel popcorn and chocolate. today, i doubt there will be food but do you think i should keep a log of my food intake during this hard season of the year? thanks for caring. so many people just don't understand.