Quote:
Originally Posted by marjan
but honesty, if this is bothering you this much, why don't you pick up the phone right now and be honest with yourself and your feelings and tell her what you are killing yourself for....then you are this way or that way....
can I ask you how old you are?
I think the part of rejection is bothering us...that's all!
with love
Marjan
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Marjan,
I'm 48.
I've thought a lot about trying to call her, but I can come up with "reasons" not to do that. Actually, I did call her about a month ago. I didn't leave a message because she always tells me she doesn't know how to check her voice mail. If I do leave her a message and I don't hear from her, I wonder is it because she really didn't check her message or is it because she just doesn't want to talk to me? I can go on and on with this thought process about why I should or shouldn't do this or that. There are some other thoughts I have about this that I can't get sorted out right now.
Yes, I definately feel rejected. When she call to tell me she was having surgery and that I didn't have to visit her, I felt rejected big time. She loves to do crafts and is very good at it. She had made me a wreath for my door. I didn't realize just how hurt I was until I got home. I not only tore the wreath up, but one of her pictures as well. I know that sounds childish.
Another time that the rejection really hurt was when she asked me why I came to see her in the hospital when she told me not to. I was hurt so much that I almost told her that I wanted to end our friendship. I think the only reason that I didn't was because my therapist suggested that I don't do that.
Dwayne61