Tishie first let me say that you did the right thing by leaving him. I also have got to tell you that your a strong person to leave a house with all your kids like that. He really did showed his true colors when he couldn't even leave the house for you and the kids. Shang I do agree with you. Abuse is abuse. I was in a relationship with physical and verbal abuse. Once those scars are there, they never go away. It's like you can't be yourself around that person because any little thing can trigger him off. (or her) A person who is abusive needs help. Until they can get treated for it, and realize what is going on with their anger, then IMO it's useless to believe they will change. Let me also just say that when this relationship ended it took me a very, very long time to realize other men wasn't like that. I was dating other guys and if they just showed a little bit of anger than I would shut down, and I was frightened. The only thing good that came out of this, is that when I see or I'm around an angry man, I know to get away from him quick.