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Old Jul 20, 2009, 03:21 PM
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depressedalaskan depressedalaskan is offline
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Member Since: Jun 2009
Posts: 1,801
Quote:
Originally Posted by darkpurplesecrets View Post
((((depressedalaskan))))

Thank you for your post. It does make alot of sense.

For me, I shut down and push friends away because I am trying to protect them from all I am going through. I am so afraid that they will get tired of the way I am or not want to hear. So I beat them to the punch, and put up a protective wall for both of us. Sometimes at the same time I am pushng them away----I am screaming please do not go----only they do not know this unless they really know me. It is me that shuts down not my friends. I am so scared at times that it is all I can do.

I hate depression and all it does. Makes me immoble at times. Sometimes I cannot even ask for help, I cannot even pick up the phone to call anyone, and sometimes, depression convinces me I am nothing and no one would care anyways. And the masks do get so heavy from all the coats of paint that we seem to put on it everyday. I get so tired of trying to hold up the mask. But I get so afraid of others seeing me so hurting.

dps
((((((darkpurplesecrets))))))I too hate depression and what is has done to me. You are not alone on how you feel. Thanks
Thanks for this!
ADHD1956