This sure sounds hard Christina. What does your therapist suggest as a way to deal with all of this? Do you two have a plan of attack?

Think of the different people in your family. Do you think that all of them would prefer not to know this? What if they did know--would any of them say "I wish I had known" or "thank you for telling me." Sometimes I think we worry too much about the fallout from our actions. If it is ruining your life because you are keeping this a secret from your family, then maybe you do need to tell at least some of your family members. Then let them handle it as they need to. Of course I don't know your situation at all, but it could be that family members would want to know, Christina, rather than live in ignorance with some abuser guy.