Thanks, everyone. I know that I wasn't totally alone--I still had email--right, Doc? So much for the good mood email I sent yesterday afternoon. I know that I'm going to be in trouble when I see my T on Wednesday. T's don't seem to like that term that we are "in trouble", but that's how I feel. And it's like the T is my Dad and I am the kid--I'm in trouble no matter how you look at it. Your parent is there to look out for you and teach you right from wrong, good habits, etc. T's do the same thing, but in a different way. I felt "drunk" and out of it when I went to work this morning, and I had taken the pills between 9-10pm the night before. I started feeling a little more (but not entirely) normal closer to noon today. It's going to be so much easier talking about this with my T than discussing anything about the P-word (*purging* is not yet in my vocabulary).