saveitforlater: I don't want to be pushy and write her back and tell her this but at the same time I want to start the healing process before I go back to work. Any advice?

It sounds to me as if the healing process has begun, it's just that right now it's on your end -- she's not there yet.

Unfortunately, I don't think you can force the issue. You have to wait until she's ready but the mere fact that you extended the olive branch might begin her process. I don't know what her personality is like but for some people, they need the other party to make the first move. Now that you have, she might also move very quickly.

If it does come up during the school year I suggest you not rebuff her efforts or ask her to wait until the end of June, but rather, attempt to deal with it as your energy permits. Do explain to her that you may have to take it slow because of the other demands upon your time. It does sound like there have been some issues festering for a few years so it might take a while but assuming you love and care for each other, it will be worth it.