Hi Beadys,
It has been very hard for a long time for you beads and I know you are so tired of that. I do believe things can get better, I do know healing is not a fantasy or a dream. I can look back and see times when my life was totally in the garbage can and I was barely hanging on. It IS better now and it will get better for you.
You do matter beadys and You do have friends here. Keep posting and I totally think this post fits on PTSD.
with concern,
Leslie/multipixie9