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(JD) · Jul 25, 2009, 07:14 AM

(((hugs))) I think there is always that bond between mother and son, and that denotes a "love" eternally.

I would suggest that you think about it this way: you don't hate your son, you hate his actions or his life or his behavior etc. Dividing the two will solve some of the conflict you are having, as any mother has in a situation like this.

I hope you will consult with someone IRL to help you stay strong with your new rules (i.e. he's living somewhere else.) I think it's important that you write down the things that are or have changed for you, for the better, now. Post them or keep them handy to remind you of what is in your own best interest at this time. Then it isn't you relying upon your emotions and memory, but you relying upon your own plan for good health--- your own!

Good wishes. Tough love often does bring them around eventually.