I think I almost feel like I can't look at him (my t) and say this stuff, say all the stuff he wants me to say in the way he wants me to say it because I feel too damn vulnerable. I hate being vulnerable. Who likes it anyway?

And because I'm the centre of attention and he's focused only on me. I also hate being the centre of attention.

And that he cares. Which would also open the floodgates and I hate being emotional (part of the things we're working on).

I really, really don't want to start bawling in front of him. I've only done it once and it was so embarrassing. When I first told him about what happened. Since then I only ever had tears well up, and I thought I hid them pretty well but he old me later that he notices these things

And now we have (potentially) only one session left and do I really want to get into this now?