Hmm....you sound somewhat like me! May I ask how old are you, and have you ever been married or in a committed long-term relationship in your past?
I also take antidepressants. My doc started me out on Prozac at the age of 41, while I was still in my very unhappy 20+ year marriage. I have been on one form or another of that medication ever since then, and I am now age 54, currently taking Paxil. I inherited a genetic predisposition toward depression, and the medication has helped me.
Like you have described, though, I too have had many unhappy attempts at relationships since my divorce of 8 years ago. Now, I am in the mindset to remain alone and develop my own interests, pursue my Master's Degree in Fine Art, and rebuild my broken self-esteem from the last disastrous attempt at building a relationship. That is not a bad thing!

People here will probably tell you that there many loving and caring men out there, and that you will meet your "soulmate," and, indeed, you MAY!!! I, personally, am no longer looking.

Seeking