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The antipsychotic I was on, prolixin injections, was causing me to have involuntary facial tics. So, my new pdoc took me off it and increased my seroquil to replace it. I can tell the difference now and it’s not good. I will give it some more time and hope that is all it needs and will start working as well as prolixin did.
I have no life. I am consumed by my illnesses. I ruminate and obsess constantly. And I feel like I have been lying about my symptoms to doctors for 25 years. I feel I should stop taking my meds because I don’t deserve them and don’t really need them. But everyone else feels differently. My mom and my bff and my treaters all think I am sick and need meds. It is very distressing to have these thoughts and I am sure adds to my depression.
Also, I just moved here last September and left all my routines and structure behind and now I have nothing to do.
I am working on that though. I am applying for 2 different volunteer jobs. But all I want to do is sleep (peacefully).
The nightmares went away with the prolixin shots and now they are slowly coming back.
I miss my old pdoc.
I am gaining weight because of the other meds I’m on.
AND Social Security is currently deciding whether to formally review my disability status. If I lose my health insurance, I am in a big jam. My meds cost about $850 a month, not to mention therapy and pdoc appointments’ costs. And if I get physically sick, I am just screwed.
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I love your faults because they are part of you and I love you. --my BFF
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