There needed to be 5 or 6 couples for this one, and my husband and I were the fifth. It was about reflective listening, so each person got a turn to speak to their spouse. We sat around a big table.

I was pleased with how I felt being in such a group with my T. I know that I related to her as a T, and also as someone more than an acquaintance. I felt comfortable. Interesting to me was that my T looks different up close. In therapy, we sat across the room from each other, and there was a lamp behind her. That covered up the imperfections we all have in our faces. When I used to see her close up, I always thought she looked different. This workshop was the first time I could really study her close up without feeling self-conscious. I think I'm gradually merging the way I thought of her with the way she really looks. I'm also taking her off the pedastal I had her on. I had a good, warm feeling being in the group with her, and that's what I've always wanted to accomplish.

When she left I thanked her, and she thanked me for coming. I know that she was pleased with the way I reacted also. She knows when I'm anxious or overly excited by her, and I wasn't. I feel proud of myself that I could "pull this off" with my T, expecially after her telling me that it wouldn't be good for me to attend. Of course I have to see how I am in the next few days or so, but I think I'll be all right.