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Originally Posted by DianasClan
... i am not used to saying nice things about me. other people say nice stuff but i always think if they really knew the real me they would think different. [snip] my parents say they are proud of me but they always attach something great about my brother or his wife. I cant win just a bit of praise that is all my own.
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Hi Diana, there's something I was wondering about. I think I hear you saying you have difficulty with two different things: saying (or, I guess, thinking) nice things about yourself; and getting your parents to acknowledge you without comparing or qualifying. Have you looked any more closely at how those might be connected?
The image I get from "cant win just a bit of praise" is of you and your parents locked into some kind of game where the object is for them to avoid praising you -- if you ever get them to, you score and they lose. Is that just me, or do you think that is how they see it (and/or how you do)?
Here's the part I snipped out of the middle because I wanted to ask you about it separately:
Quote:
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it physically hurts to think nice things about myself. i just want to hide.
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It sounds as if you're protecting yourself from something. What do you suppose would happen if you were to ignore the warning signs ("it physically hurts") and not hide?
Best wishes,
FooZe