If you want to know *for sure* that you're not alone in your struggle with BP, I recommend "Madness, A Bipolar Life" by Marya Hornbacher.

She writes about her struggles with BP and several psychotic breaks she has had. It's as if she's my ghost writer - I saw so much of myself in this book, and in the epilogue she gave me some new information to investigate regarding helping myself live with this disorder.

Warning: this book is graphic. She describes her suicide attempts and the psychotic breaks leading up to them in detail.