Jul 28, 2009 at 08:56 PM
Nothing personal or disrespectful here but I don't know what words to substitute for suicidal. Sometimes I am dense so please forgive my ignorance.
I have tried to seek help when I have felt suicidal but for me it was not simple nor effective.
An example - in 1989 I had postpartum depression and called my gyn/ob doc and told him I was severely depressed. His response - drink a beer. Seriously, that is the advice he gave me. Two days after I called him I attempted suicide but it failed.
In 2007 I was very manic for a few days and then within several hours my mood went from flying high to rock bottom. I called my psychiatrist's office and then went to his office to wait until he could work me in. After waiting awhile his office worker told me to go home and he would call me later that evening. He never called. The next day I returned to his office and they said he would not be in the office that day. I felt abandoned. So I bought some orange juice and vodka and started drinking which was a part of my suicide plan. I was then in progress toward my suicide since I mattered to nobody. I decided to see if my therapist was in the office since her office was en route to my suicide destination and if she was not there then that would just be one more sign that I should end it all. But she was in and she sent me to an emergency dept nearby and I was admitted.
Although I was a member of PC I knew I could not post about my intent. I felt totally alone and my mood was grim. Personally I think if somebody is that far down they need support anywhere they can find it. I know others disagree and that is fine but I wish PC could be part of my support network if I am suicidal again. Surely I could find better advice here than a doc telling me to drink a beer.
These are my thoughts and I respect that others here will disagree with me.
__________________
The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well. anonymous
|