Thank you so much for the supportive replies. It hurts to know that others understand because they have been, or are there, too. But it helps to know that I am not the only one struggling with this. HUGS to all!

Jen, thanks for the link. I went to the site at the bottom of the article, and I can definitely see myself in the Pure-O type, but more closely seem to match the Responsibility OC type. I am driven by guilt, it's what motivates me. I can't even imagine doing the CBT stuff, how horrifying. I hope you are finding some answers. Love ya, and thanks.