I have not made a lasting friendship in 30 years. I am on friendly terms with people I work with for the time I work with them, but nothing lasts beyond that. I take classes and meet people outside of work too.

I don't know how to approach people to maintain a lasting friendship. I discussed this during my last time in therapy and sort of know the things to do, like asking them questions, not talking about myself, etc., but I still don't know the steps to take to bring people closer to me.

It hurts and I feel lonely and unwanted most of the time. I am better than I used to be about it, but I would still like to change things if I could only learn how. We just bought this house and I'm so excited and happy and want to invite people to an Open House, but I'm so afraid no one will come, I probably won't bother.

On the flip side, when I do seem to hit it off with people--the people I'd really like to stay friends with after a class or job ends--I wonder why they like me at all? And I doubt my feelings that they like me are true.

Any advice would be appreciated, but I'm not in a position to return to therapy right now, and I think I can do this without the personal touch of a therapist.

Sorry this is so long.