That cycle that this Family T has posited is (ironically) just what I was coming to the conclusion of the other night - but not knowing anyway of fixing it, as I am in step 5 on that chart. I am very interested in learning more!

For the discussion, my parents were "old" to have kids by the standard norm. And they should have NEVER had kids. In fact, I was a "mistake". My dad never even wanted kids. Mom always wanted a baby. She didn't understand that those grow up and hasn't let me do so. Yet at the same time, both parents were really children, and I was born "old" so I took care of their emotional needs most the time, starting at 6 years old (after I graduated from hiding under the bed or table during their fights).

He came from a broken home and alcoholic dad, she came from a "together home" with physical abuse and an alcoholic dad.