I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I have a 17 year old daughter who has ran away twice, and is just now getting some sense back. She has lived with her dad, and also blames everything on me. I had her for a little bit. I took her to my PDOC and she suffers from anxiety just like me. She won't take any meds for it either, and she does need them. It sounds like she is very angry about everything in general, have you asked her if she would like to go to therapy with you? I would also like to say that my mom passed when I was 15. Anyways when I was your daughter's age I felt like I had no one there for me, and I was also jealous of everyone who had a mom. Your daughter may feel this way too. She wants what your other daughter has with her dad, but she can't have it. She knows that it's not your fault. She's just taking it out on you, and everyone else in your family. IMO just from my own experience I think that she needs therapy. She is hurting right now, and she needs to heal from it.