heh... i have the same thing about cancer.

people sometimes ask me why i still smoke with gum and that being available to help me quit, i always respond with "how else am i suppose to get cancer?"

sadly im not really joking, i really do want to die, and preferably soon (not a suicide threat, i cant do that, ive tried, it doesnt work for me)

as for suicide not being inevitable, well in my opinion you probably could avoid it. it will probably take some major changes in your life, some therapy, and some help from your loved ones... but it's definately do able.

it just requires alot of well... work, and the motivation to do so.

i currently have very little of the latter, so i just kind of wallow in self defeat. i would think with a family and kid, your motivation would be up there, but hey, i never been in that family situation thing so i cant say for sure. however it sounds like something stick it through.

dont you want to see your son go through his adventures in life? teach him to drive, birds and bees, first heartbreak? that sort of stuff?

sounds like good motivation to make a change to me.