Hi Forgotten and welcome.
I hear you and am sorry you are part of the "club". This is a good place to be. People here are very supportive.

I believe it does get better.....but it takes work on your part as well as your T's. I've spent yrs in therapy and for some reason it has FINALLY gotten thru that I am responsible for my own destiny...for my healing and for my working thru so much "stuff".

For years I filled my tool box and learned how to "use" the tools but didn't make a connection on WHEN to use them or HOW to find the right one by trial and error....finally using what I have and adding new tools as I listen to how others have coped, grown, learned.

This is a good place to talk it out. As you do and as you feel safe you will find that you will be supported and cared for.