Quote:
Originally Posted by wanttoheal
If I haven't had a frequently enough connection with T throughout the week, we have found that it takes nearly the whole session for my brain to see that she is still T (depending on the length of time). It's frustrating for me. I'm sure it must be for T as well. We always have to spend at least 10-15 minutes reconnecting in the beginning of the session. This is often because I am not present when I get there and it takes me a while to come inside my brain to know where I am. But when we end up taking 3/4 of the time we have set aside for therapy, it really makes it hard to delve into anything. And if we took 3/4 of the session to realize T is still T, that sometimes puts us at a deficit for the next session. There are times we end up spending the entire session just lightly talking about nothing (and I know it's important to do that too) just so I can see that T is still T. This can also be completely negated if my brain disconnects before I have contact with her again.
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((((((((((((((((((wanttoheal))))))))))))))))
I could have written most of your post. I SO relate to what you are saying.
The paragraph above describes my therapy so perfectly. I go twice a week, or there is no chance I would ever be able to do any work BESIDES trying to connect and know that I am safe. And we have pretty frequent between-session contact, too. I know it seems extreme to a lot of people, but it seems like the only way I can hold on to T, and who he is. Lots of weeks, I spend the Tuesday session mostly in silence, just trying to get safe, and we can't do any work until Thursday...and then there is the four day break, and then we do it all over again. It IS frustrating, for me and for T. I wish it were different.
I have the same issue with people besides T. Actually, that's one of the reason I love facebook (which I recently joined)...all of the low-key but frequent contact with people keeps them "there" for me.
I wish I knew the solution. I've been so frustrated in therapy lately because of this very thing - lots of breaks this summer has meant a HUGE step backwards in therapy for me. It feels really discouraging sometimes.
I don't have ANY words of advice or wisdom, but I just wanted you to know you are not alone....and to send you lots of
