I feel as though I no longer exsist. Yet again something else. I really hate my life and I no longer want to be part of it. I have not let my anger and hurt too out of control today in front of my dad. I got like an hour of sleep so that he could sleep in. I had fresh hot coffee when he did get up. I made him breakfast. I made him lunch. I planned this really good dinner for him. Well no dinner. My ypunger sister (who is his favorite(outta five kids I am number five) calls and I talk to her and tell her what I am doing and then she talks to daddy and she has this wonderful plan to go to the movies. My dad asks my younger brothers and never said a word to me. I was standing in the kitchen next to him when my brother says that they have to leave. It was like I wasn't even there. Left with out saying a word.

I seriously think that everyones life would be better without me!!